paisleypiper's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- deja clean I feel a bit disconnected from my online journal. It is hard to know where to start because I have been extremely busy and have many thoughts about the holidays� but, I�m tired of thinking about the holidays. And so I move on. I ate some bad fish, I think, and have been driving the porcelain bus, as they say. So if I sound queasy, I am. And if you could see me, in a t-shirt and pajama bottoms, my hair a big curly mess, all installed on the couch. A bit pathetic, but I am glad to be on the path to recovery and am looking forward to increased health in the new year. Quinn and I have been cleaning house the past few days. With the enormous binder-assembly project, a class, regular life and work, we have been cleaning quickly and fantasizing about cleaning up the house, room by room, thoroughly and specifically. It is amazing the difference it makes in atmosphere � the house feels happier, calmer, and much more restful. Cleaning provides a lot of time for thinking. And the non-intellectual, repetitive nature of it, seems to stimulate my creative thoughts. As soon as I take time to sit down and collect the promising fragments, they have departed. I sucked them up in the vacuum cleaner or threw them away in the ever-growing trash bag that follows me from room to room. One of the things I thought about is deja veux. A couple weeks ago, while driving in Lincoln with my aunt, I experienced rather intense deja veux. I never know exactly what to make of the sensation � what does it mean? Why did I experience it? Is it real? But in thinking about deja veux, I�ve noticed that I always have deja veux while moving and it is always during something insignificant � driving down a car, walking down a street, playing in the woods�. Rarely do I have deja veux while still and calm. This puzzles me but is just the sort of thought-while-cleaning that I have been experiencing lately. Do we see differently when we are moving than when we are still? Do we see differently when a machine moves us than when we move ourselves? And is there any relationship between deja veux and reincarnation? I don�t know what I think about reincarnation. It strikes me as too literal to conceptualize this unit that is me and moves from body to body across the ages. Yet I do believe that matter and spirit never truly go away � they change shape and form. And so perhaps there are relationships between different lives. I think I�ll go sort out my sock drawer and see whether anything else crops up. 5:46 p.m. - 2002-12-30 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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