paisleypiper's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- i voted today I can�t sleep. In fact I�m wide awake. I�m trying to find the courage to talk to others about Howard Dean� I�m wishing I could leave my job and go work for Howard Dean�s campaign. These days, if I�m not worrying about work, I�m thinking about how much I want to write and publish poetry. If I�m not thinking about poetry, I�m thinking about Dean and the need I have to be part of the movement that will take our country back. Poetry and politics don�t necessarily mix, so I probably won�t write a poem about Howard Dean. But I do have a few things to say about why I support him and why I believe that he is the person I want to gamble on to defeat George Bush. In 1980, I supported John Anderson. I went to the local mall and several presidential campaign offices were located there. I picked up all of their materials � in those days, stacks of white sheets of paper with black ink, reports and such, and that was considered fancy. Despite discouragement from my mother, I read Carter�s, Reagan�s, and Anderson�s materials and decided that issue for issue, I thought Anderson made the most sense. I quite carrying my peanut lunch box, set aside my peanut necklace and took to making signs about my endorsement of Anderson. In the evenings my Republican parents would grill me on my political facts and gang up on me, trying to convince me that Reagan was the best candidate. It would end after a long time of my defending Anderson as best I could but eventually my parents would make me cry and I would retreat to my room. There, I would strengthen my resolve and produce another sign or pamphlet. Sometimes, on a lonely afternoon, I would put letters on car windshields up at the grocery store until some adult would yell at me. From an early age I loved politics and really cared about my country, but somehow, around the house, all of my efforts were reduced to rebellion and lack of sophistication. Whether or not Anderson could count in that I don�t know. I was 11 and this is not an essay about Anderson, it�s about Howard Dean. I would also like to observe that in this country I was given the distinct message that I did not have a right to have a political opinion until I had a real job and was of voting age. And then, the media wondered why my generation was �disinvested.� These days we would probably think a girl who cared about politics was cute, not annoying. Parents probably don�t say in hushed tones �if you mention any support of any cause that is in the least bit democrat-ish you will be sent to your room immediately� before any sort of social occasion. Ridicule was common from my family and friends � I guess I grew up expecting it and am not exactly shocked now that I am not close to any of them. And I�m afraid that part of it has to do with view points. My family works on me � for them, it is pertinent that if I am going to be part of the various families to which I am related, I�d better be exactly like them or someone far better than I am. It is a harsh environment, and it is in this harsh environment that I have deeply rooted my own beliefs. Our country is in a crisis. We have, in my opinion, a �President� with a simple agenda � to secure wealth for the wealthy and to prove that he could follow in his father�s footsteps, like a prince follows a king. This �President� does not care �. Does not care that we are fighting a war we can�t define or understand. And because people are so afraid that the soldiers will experience what soldiers experienced returning from Vietnam, people think they must support the war. And by measures support the �President� � a whole branch of my family is doing just that, and I think they are probably representative. Is it brilliant? Is it a way to tear apart the fiber of this country, ruin the economic stability of this country and keep people distracted while CEO�s rake in enormous salaries and raises off the radar screen? Or did we just want to go hit someone after the terrorist attacks in September 2001. To worsen the crisis, we are loosing our rights as citizens. We are cashing in the rights that people fought for us to have two hundred years ago. We�re trading them in for some measure of security that is part of this reaction. It�s a mistake to trade in freedom and rights, even if it seems as though we really have so much freedom. I have lived my entire life entirely too close to John Ashcroft. My parents love John Ashcroft and always have because he is a Republican. Many people hope to make a decent sum of money one day and so the Republican ticket appeals to them based on perceived tax cuts, especially when it comes to estate taxes. I also dream that some unknown relative will leave me a fortune and I would have to have it taken up by taxes. But then I think about how we pay relatively little in taxes. I think about how we have such great wealth. And I think about Dean. Because he is the first candidate I have ever heard be upfront about how much we have in this country and how much we don�t have. The richest country on earth can�t educate their children, reduce their infant mortality rate, balance their budget, work for equal rights for all citizens�.. We have been needing, as a country, to get a deeper conversation going for quite some time. The media has been driving too much of our lives. Even our largest, most important public conversations happen on the media�s terms � in sound bytes. I think it is time to know a bit more about the ideas and initiatives of the people we are electing. In a sound-byte it is nearly impossible to tell the difference between candidates who can be dangerously different in office. Dean is talking, and he is talking with some depth and in ways that show me that he values this country and the American experience. I admire that. In this house, when Quinn and I watch Dean TV, we get a little teary. Dean is the first candidate I have ever heard say he is tired of being divided along the lines of race, gender, religion, sexual orientation. I am impressed by his courage to run on his principles and to do this so that we can return to having a democracy. And maybe after seeing how scary it is to loose our rights and our economic stability, we will be better able to embrace the responsibility that comes with a democracy. That is where I am � thinking about my responsibility to this country. Right now, I need to get back into my spirit of participating in politics and in the civic life of this country. I voted today � just a small, local election over a few of the same old topics. Only there was one question on the ballot that aimed to restrict a citizen�s ability for initiative petition campaigns. There goes a bit of that freedom, a bit of that democratic freedom�. But at least I voted. Now, to get the privilege of voting for Howard Dean one of these days. 2:01 a.m. - 2003-11-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||